A Great GAL!

So lately I've been pumping up the volume on my Gyaru fashion and I'm sooo happy there are sooo many GALS out there to help. However there is one I'd love to highlight and share her amazing blog!

MITSU! HERE'S TO YOU!! Please read her blog if you are at all interested in gyaru. She covers so much from deco, nails, outfit trends and even dieting (which I'm following her tips and they are working!), and an ask anything section!

http://universal-doll.com/

CHECK HER OUT!!!!

Horrible.

The day started great! I got all prettied up.

I went to my first Japanese Tea Ceremony lesson.

I got a package in the mail (my new Japanese calender).

Then... went horrible.

I missed his call from the base or where ever he is on their stop in Dubai....

Then I found out that he hasn't been getting my emails.

And when I adjusted the address to what he said to do... they all bounced back three times... saying "account does not exist" Now I can't get in touch with him at all.

I can hardly stop crying and I feel guilty and miserable... I think I will just sleep now.

Over the Ocean!

I heard from Reagan yesterday! YAY!!! I was very excited despite how short the email was, apparently everyone was trying to get on the computer so time was limited... however the important things got across. He's alive and well, he loves me and misses me terribly and how I should email him back!

I'm so glad he's okay this far and looks like they are making good time!! Maybe he will be home sooner after all!!! Wouldn't that be wonderful!!!

New Year: New Layout!

Well since 2010 is not just going to go away I decided a new layout was in order... I really should make a custom one cause I don't like the templates very much on this one... but I fiddled with it and managed to get something that was agreeable... maybe I could get Danielle to make me a simple one...

Anyway I like the spring colors of this layout... not that I'm wishing for spring to get here faster (Come on ya damn season! I want flowers and my man back!! Grr!)

Hope all is well with everyone and enjoy the new layout!

Nothing Like a New Do!

Plain and simple... my new Gyaru haircut!! OH YES! And I loved my make today! False lashes and everything!

Oh Girls!

One of the reasons I love all the girls at USMC Gals! they stumble upon things like this! Thanks Jessi for sharing!!!

He hears you cry over the phone,
Hears the sorrow and pain in your tone
You miss him so bad
But he knows.

You bravely swallow your fears
And quietly wipe away the tears
Yet you're still dying inside
But he knows.

Then you tell him it's okay
That you'll see him again someday
You just hate to be apart
But he knows.

Your struggle is great and the pain immense
Your inner war is epic and the battles intense
All you want is him
But he knows.

The pain and the sorrow
The loneliness and tears
The frustration of waiting
The numerous fears

He knows what it is like
He understands it very well
He knows all the feelings
He knows all the thoughts
But he wants you to know
That no matter what
No matter where you are
No matter how near
Or how very far
He loves you

And he understands above all
The things you go through
Because, although he won't show it
So you won't always know it,
He goes through all of it too...

Appointment Day!

So I spent today with my mother running to several appointments, but some highlights.

Today's Outfit: I explored with my glasses today... so today it was more Onee-Gal ish... (big sister)

Crepes for Lunch (The Dessert one didn't last long enough for a photo! ^x^ :

My Eyes all Dialated... damn eye doctor! Its sorta like having circle lenses:

2010: Extended Issues

WARNING: POST AS SOME SERIOUS THINGS TO DISCUSS ONLY READ AND COMMENT IF TRUELY CONCERNED!


Well the New Year certainly pulled the rug from under me and landed me flat on my backside. Well more accurately it snuck up on me during a game of dominos at my grandparents’ house. No parties, no fireworks, no midnight kiss, not even champagne… but for some reason that’s okay with me.

As I mentioned previously I knew the holidays were going to be rough time since Reagan is Lord knows where at the moment. He’s been gone for just barely two weeks and I already want to yank my hair out, not talking to the current love of my shortish life! But seriously I can’t decide if all in all Reagan has been better for me… okay don’t take it like that, I love him dearly and couldn’t imagine losing him by fate or by choice, but he is part of what leads me into my next predicament.

After much thinking and some research I think that I may have a mild or moderate form of depression. At first I thought I was overreacting but after keeping tabs on myself for several months (since the summer) I am more convinced that there is something wrong…. I can’t help but always feel moody, lethargic, lonely, lacking an appetite, easily annoyed and most frighteningly unmotivated. The biggest issue I think is though I’m still clinging to those thoughts of my appearance and my confidence with regards to it, I don’t think it’s appropriate to lay out here but I think that is the underlying cause, which is partially where Reagan comes in. I’ve also been sleeping way more then I should be. I’m getting paler and paler and my mother thinks I might be slightly anemic so it’s time to go to the doctor to get it checked out; but I think I WILL go to the Counseling Center when I get back to school, because I’d rather not have my mother butting her nose into EVERYTHING in my life… sometimes she thinks she’s helping and to be honest it’s just a frustration and a hindrance. That and I need to get this sorted out; if it’s serious I want to beat it head on!

And why bring Reagan into this… well I don’t really want to talk to him and worry him about it… I mean on one hand I adore him and he is making me more confident but at the same time he also adds a lot of anxiety to my life and I am still really struggling with a lot of physical insecurities and I just want to step back and slow down with him a little bit… I hate to do that but I know it’s something that even though I don’t want to, until I can get my mental state figured out I think I need to do this. Don’t get me wrong! That doesn’t mean I’ll be giving up my cozy warm spot next to him in bed at night, OH NO! That cuddle time is all mine! It just means more outside the sheets, clothes on kind of quality time.

If not only for him but for my family and my dearest friends who begin to feel more like family everyday but in large part for him I need to be a stronger woman, I am embarrassed to be laying with him or sitting in the car with him and bursting into tears because of some compliment or question that he makes, that in some twisted way that is NOT his fault makes me feel insecure, want to cover myself and not let him touch me. It isn’t fair for him, because he really is such a great man!! And I just can’t stand it anymore, I’m sick of being weak. I’ve pushed my mental problems down for too long and I think its finally taking its toll… so I’m going to fight this… I have to.

And now for something entirely different... that won't make you want to shoot yourself in the foot... my new man... or bunny! His name is Labbit!

2010: The Lighter Note

Okay so its resolution time! First lets recap!

2009:

1. Get straight A’s… yeah that didn’t go so well but I have a 3.59 GPA! YAY!

2. Mandarin… when was I supposed to start that… I think I will just start bugging Reagan to teach me more Cantonese.

3. I still have a job a Corbett! I’m going to apply for the Trainer position as soon as I am able!

4. SAVE! That one didn’t go so well, thanks in large part to Reagan for emptying my coffers for some serious fun time!

5. I didn’t lose 15lbs. I’ve been maintaining at 150lbs. some of the gain is in muscle is good but I’m still not happy so to the gym!

6. STAY SOCIAL! Oh I did that! I got a boyfriend many more friends from both the US and Japan and other countries! My calendar is never empty!

So the resolutions for this year!

1. Apply and get accepted at Yamagata University Japan!

2. Work even harder at my studies! Participate in Japan Cup and get an A in Japanese!

3. Write more letters! Especially to the Japanese students!

4. Get myself into the Counseling Center to see someone about my mental state (Read Extended Issues for more detail).

5. Become a stronger and more positive woman for my man and for those around me!

6. Remove most of the “Negative Nellie’s” in my life! See ya girls! I don’t need your drama too!

7. Keep losing weight, I won’t say how much. My target is somewhere in the 135lbs neighborhood (I want to lose enough to lose some “chest weight” to put it politely)

8. Work on developing a gyaru style, poised perfect and stylish! I’m becoming a woman so its time to dress like one!

9. Make this year EVEN better then the last! But between friends and Reagan this could be the toughest!